Tag Archives: Cricket

BCCI’s criticism-tolerance and the role of critics…

By Mohan Krishnamoorthy (@mohank)

There is much to dislike about the BCCI… there is much to like about Harsha Bhogle

The bully

I am not a fan of the Board of Control for Cricket in India (BCCI) or of the way it functions. Many journalists, writers and opinion-makers (I will use these terms interchangeably to mean “opinion influencers”) around the world appear convinced that the BCCI is a self-serving organisation that does not have the best interests of either world cricket and/or (sadly) Indian cricket.

This might be an inaccurate view. This might be a view that is highly unfair on BCCI. However, it is a view. And there appears to be a growing number of people in the world who hold this view.

When writers from around the world express their strong anti-BCCI views, they often need to brace themselves for a subsequent attack from a (largely) Indian fan base. This often includes a trivialising — either of them or of their views — by millions of cricket fans from India who think that this criticism of the BCCI is equivalent to a criticism of India. Many of these critics are easily (and lazily) labelled as racist by the chest-thumping flag-bearers. We can only cringe when these critics are attacked mercilessly in the comments section of the anti-BCCI articles they write. India and the BCCI cannot be criticized.

Some of these opinion makers from around the world are possibly wrong (at worst) or ill-informed (at best) in their criticism of the BCCI. Many of them are, in my view, right.

There is much to dislike about the BCCI.

The BCCI, rightly or wrongly, has an image of a ‘world cricket bully that goes around throwing its weight and thumping tables’. Some of this perception is justified. Some of it is about the “old world” worrying that the “new world” will use its new found power tastelessly and wrongfully.

However, perceptions have a way of becoming realities.

My perception is that the BCCI worries about money more than it does, about the state of the game; that the BCCI worries more about the size of its coffers than about how it is perceived by the rest of the cricketing world; that the BCCI concentrates more on the power that comes from the money it generates than it does about using that money to develop the game; that the BCCI thinks about the monetary value of the broadcast contracts it signs more than the quality of the broadcast; that the BCCI thinks more of the size of its audience viewership-base than it does about the audience itself; that the BCCI worries more about the fans that it has today than it does about caring for the sustainability of the game; that the BCCI worries more about today than it does about tomorrow; that the BCCI constantly plays victim than it does leader; that the BCCI craves praise more than it tolerates criticism.

The undeniable fact is that the BCCI is the most powerful member of the international cricket fraternity. It provides the ICC with more than 60% of its revenues. With that comes power. As a prominent and respected Australia-based writer once said (by email): “Of course, it is not BCCI’s fault that they have power at the world cricket table. Nor is to their credit!”

What I would like to see from the BCCI is that they use that power sensibly; that they show exemplary leadership. What I would like to see from them is an open, accountable and transparent organization that shows the world how cricket ought to be run. There were many things wrong about the way the English Cricket Board , in collusion with Cricket Australia, ran the game of cricket in the period leading up to 1990. In the early-90s the BCCI accidentally bumped into a television contract. The world of cricket changed. Irrevocably.

The past wrongs are undeniable. However, the BCCI has an opportunity now to show how the game ought to be run differently; an opportunity that BCCI is, in my view, ruining.

Critics, journalists and opinion-makers

So, it has to be the responsibility of Indian journalists to question, explore, attack, inquire and constantly seek honesty, integrity, accountability and transparency from the BCCI.

However, we also know that most journalists and opinion makers in India will find it hard — no, make that almost impossible — to be critical of (or take a stand against) BCCI. The organisation controls accreditation, passes, access and hence, the privileges that journalists enjoy. There are few independent voices in Indian cricket — voices that do not care about either access or privilege. And without access and privileges, a journalist is as useful to cricket as slurry is to shoes. The BCCI runs cricket in India like a feudal landlord would, his/her land. Access and privilege are traded for good press and praise.

It is impossible for critical views to be aired in an environment like this. Some respectable voices are paid by the BCCI — we know of at least two such cases. Good press can be (and is) purchased. Good press can be purchased for cash; lots of it.

I cannot think of anyone other than Kapil Dev and Bishen Bedi who have, in recent times, criticized the BCCI openly. The former was ‘disenfranchised’ as a result of his ICL involvement. The latter seeks no favors or privileges and has always been his own man. The rest dabble in nothing but banal clichés and platitudes.

Enter Harsha Bhogle

It is impossible for even a respected and learned voice — like Harsha Bhogle (for example) — to be harshly critical of the BCCI. Even if the criticism is accurate, justified and backed up with significant analysis/data, it is almost a foregone conclusion that such critical opinion will be dealt with the same equanimity as a hand would, an irritant mosquito. The hand that feeds just cannot be tarnished. Clarity and objectivity become the loser.

Harsha Bhogle is a respected and responsible commentator. He has contributed strongly and with remarkable integrity, over a 20 year period, as one of the most learned, mature and responsible voices in Indian cricket. He is an inspiration to a generation of aspiring sports journalists, TV anchors and TV commentators in India. One such aspiring young journalist and TV anchor once said to me that his career objective was to be “The next Harsha Bhogle”. He was inspired by this simply-stated, challenging goal.

Today, Bhogle is to commentary what Sachin Tendulkar is to batting. Just as it is impossible to imagine an Indian team without Tendulkar, it is impossible to imagine a commentary box without Bhogle in it. He is the “go to” person when Indian cricket sound-bytes are required by the BBC or the Australian Broadcasting Corporation (ABC). And rightly so. His body of work precedes him. His body of work speaks of passion and suggests vast knowledge, tremendous impact and signifcant contribution. He is an honourable man.

A tête-à-tête with Harsha Bhogle

I got into a brief (and somewhat heated) tête-à-tête with Bhogle on Twitter a few days ago (Sunday 13 May 2012). The exchange was captured by Nicole Sobotker.

It was an exchange and not a debate or an argument, for Twitter does not provide the proponents with either the time or space for engaging in genuine understanding — leave alone augmentation — of perspective or context. However, it appeared as though it was an argument. For the sake of this piece, I will call it a debate.

The debate stemmed from an article in the Times of India. In it, Anil Kumble raised questions on India’s dismal overseas Test record in 2011-12. The report, quite alarmingly, stated that the BCCI is “likely to” request the Team India coach to submit a report on the dismal record. So let us get this right. The coach’s report has not been submitted. The report has not been requested. The report may not be requested. It is only “likely” that a report may be asked for.

Bhogle reacted to the above report with surprise. He wrote, “so anil kumble is told duncan fletcher will submit a report after his vacation. this is may, the last of 8 tests lost was in january”.

Extremely valid. But hardly surprising. In the intervening period, we had a few ODIs and immediately after that, the IPL distraction commenced. It distracted BCCI from 0-8. It distracted the players from 0-8. I believe it may have distracted Bhogle too from 0-8.

I responded to Bhogle saying that the article was hardly surprising to me considering that everyone that ought to care (including him) “have been busy with the utterly draining madness called the IPL”.

Bhogle asked if everything he had “said in England and Australia while the Tests were on is (now) forgotten.”

Evidently, yes!

The BCCI, who need to listen, had forgotten, The IPL is their balm. It enables them to forget. It enables cricketers to forget. It enables fans to forget. It enables “serious voices” in the media to forget.

In my view, it is not sufficient for the voice of cricket to make a few noises while the whipping took place in England and Australia, and to assume that the responsibility of the voice was, as a result, over. The noise that was made, then, has clearly had no impact whatsoever. So either Bhogle needs to carry out an introspection and assessment of the impact, weight, carry and strength of his voice or assume that it is not enough to shout once and sit back. In India, and especially with the BCCI, it is necessary to keep shouting till you are heard.

That is only if one wants to see change; if one wants to make a difference; if one wants to use the unenviable position — that one has worked assiduously hard for — to good effect. Bhogle considers himself a “serious voice”.

A serious voice cares about impact; about making a difference; about being more than a ‘caller’ of the game.

Bhogle did write with pain and anguish in January about how India needs to overhaul — not merely tweak — its cricket system. He also made a suggestion of a 12-team Ranji Trophy.

With the BCCI though, it is not enough to declare the pain of a 0-8 whipping once or twice during the whipping. Any commentator would do that. Several did. One who cares and one who has a body of work that is accumulated over a period of 20 years should look beyond the whipping and relentlessly seek change. The fact that nothing happened subsequent to the whipping and the subsequent anguish expressed by Bhogle is a suggestion that Indian cricket does not need or admit even a respectable voice like Bhogle’s!

Then, either through boredom or expectations from his employers or loss of personal passion or an air of defeatism (or a combination of the above), Bhogle himself seems to have moved on from the pain of 8-0 to making somewhat banal observations on fitness comparisons across teams, Kohli’s next big challenge, Tendulkar’s 100th 100 burden (obligatory) and retirement timing of great players. Since that series of observations, Bhogle donned his IPL hat and unleashed on us a series of IPL-related articles: whether the IPL will be the “big ticket”, an IPL-5 wishlist (in which he declares, “the IPL will have to survive and blossom as a cricket tournament”), on why Test cricket is not the only cricket, and whether the switch-hit is kosher.

As Shyam Sundararaman says in this piece on Bhogle, “he rarely takes a stance on issues of not(e).”

I am not sure whether I would agree with that. However, in my exchange with him, Bhogle asked if 10 years or 15 years of service are not good enough. He claimed that it is “easy to throw darts a people without realising they’ve been and are serious voices.”

My point is simple: If after 15 years of service, the pain and anguish expressed by the “serious voice” of Bhogle in January leads us to a situation in May where it is only “likely” that the BCCI will ask for a report from Duncan Fletcher, clearly one of the following three observations are right: (a) Bhogle’s is not a serious voice, (b) the BCCI does not care about Bhogle’s voice or any “serious” voice, however serious it might be, (c) Given that we are dealing with the BCCI, Bhogle needs to be even more serious about his voice for even him to consider it as serious enough.

I am convinced (a) is wrong. Bhogle is the serious voice in Indian cricket. The answer, I suspect, lies somewhere between (b) and (c).

The IPL bandwagon

I do not care if Bhogle or anyone else applauds the IPL. Irrespective of the seriousness (or otherwise of his voice) it is his choice to celebrate it. And he does. It is my choice to scorn the IPL. And I do.

It is, in my view, a decadent chest thump; an entertainment package that makes us forget the 8-nil drubbing. In my view, it has no context or relevance. For example, I have watched almost all games in IPL-1, many games in IPL2 and a few in IPL3. Yet, I can’t remember a single game other than that game in Dharmasala in which M. S. Dhoni hit the winning runs off the last ball. Yet when I mention the numbers 97 or 241, everyone knows what I am talking about.

But, I digress…

A review of Indian cricket

It is Bhogle’s choice to celebrate the IPL. However, if he really cares about Indian cricket and felt the pain of the 0-8 loss, the responsible thing to do would have been to continually hammer for a review of what went wrong; to demand what came of Aakash Chopra’s review of domestic cricket; to demand an Argus style review of Indian cricket.

Within weeks of the second successive Ashes loss in 2010, Australian journalists demanded a review. They were all over Cricket Australia like a rash. Cricket Australia (CA) listened. It went ahead and constituted a review committee with clear and agreed terms of reference. The Argus Review process was initiated. It was a review of Australian cricket and covered everything from domestic competitions, player payments, CA governance, coaching structure, selection committee functioning, etc. It was comprehensive.

Such a review might work for Australia. Something similar may never work in India. That is not the point. The point is that serious voices demanded a review. Serious voices continued to demand a review until it was conducted. The Argus Review recommendations are now being implemented.

Such a review may be impossible — or even unnecessary — in India. With the BCCI what you get is a serious series of ‘closed-door meetings’ held by ‘think-tanks’. And when explanations/clarifications are sought for certain decisions, what you may get is a bullish roadside scrap in which the BCCI official barks, “Boss, you just shut up ok”, “chuppal se horthenga”, “googly dalenga”, “ungli karenga” and a clutch of other obscene profanities.

Monopsony and the market argument

But the BCCI can do bullish. It has the money. It has the power. It has no absolute necessary for accountability — to either the Government or to players or fans. It can unleash a national selector on us who says “boss you just shut up ok”.

The BCCI is a monopoly. Sorry, it is a monopsony.

In an imperfect market, the BCCI is a single buyer — that operates though a license bestowed on it by the ICC — with many sellers (resources). These sellers of resources includes the players, TV companies, and “serious voices” that are somewhat dependent on BCCI ‘handouts’. The landlord may take back what he giveth if the respondents do not queue up appropriately. The dictator can specify what (s)he wants to do because these resources are dependent on the unique buyer of their services. One is either in the queue or not.

Which is why the “market” argument for justifying the IPL is as banal as the IPL itself! If we want to see the BCCI and the IPL operate in perfect market conditions, we need to have the IPL operate alongside the now-defunct ICL (or an equivalent)! Only then will we know whether resources, commentators and fans prefer the IPL over the ICL (or its equivalent)!

The critical role of serious critics

Given the market in which it operates, it is necessary for the BCCI to use its power appropriately — both externally (at the ICC table) as well as internally (in developing the game, its structures, its TV contracts and its resources). I have no hope that this will happen in a cogent, clearly articulated and transparent manner.

In the absence of such hope, what is required is a bevvy of serious voices that ask tough questions. It is insufficient if such questions are asked once and forgotten. These voices need to ask tough questions repeatedly. They need to demand to be at the review table. They need to be at the review table, making changes that will have a long-term impact. They should not be surprised over 5 months of inactivity. They should expect it and seek change; not by applauding the switch hit but by demanding a switch in priorities. They have to explore why the slide commenced with a fatigue-induced handshake at Dominica and whether the craziness of IPL-4 had a role to play in it. They should ask hard questions about the long-term health of the domestic game, for however much they applaud the richness of the IPL, the long-term resources are going to come from domestic cricket.

The “serious voice” must be, simultaneously, a critic, an ombudsman and a watchdog, where there are no explicit requirements for either of these roles. The “serious voice” must make up for the collective failure of the organisation that controls the game. This is a high expectation. It is my expectation of a “serious voice” in Indian cricket. It is an expectation that is, sadly, unmet.

It is my hope that I have not offended Mr Harsha Bhogle or his ilk. He believes his is a serious voice. It is. But we need to hear it. Not once, but repeatedly. We need to hear other voices too. For otherwise we will continue to be surprised if a review is only “likely” to be requested of a coach who presided over an 8-0 drubbing.

– Mohan

Ps: Although this blog post talks specifically about Mr Harsha Bhogle, it is intended as a request to all “serious voices” that care about Indian cricket.

Top heavy IPL: A statistical analysis.

The IPL season is in full swing.About 3/4th of the season is over and this might be a good time to assess why certain teams are doing well and why some others aren’t. This piece aims to look at things from a purely batting perspective. The particular focus is on trying to correlate the success that certain franchises have enjoyed to the performance from their top order batsmen.

These are the current rankings:

Image

Apart from rankings, few other things are also shown. None of these statistics have been taken directly from cricinfo.

IPL is a fairly batsman friendly game. Also, a team gets to face ~120 balls per inning. So, in my opinion, the performance of the top order becomes extremely critical, regardless of whether a team is trying to set a total or chase one. While one bad over might be overcome by a good one following it immediately, a couple of quick wickets, especially among the top order batsmen puts much higher pressure in a T20 game in my opinion. This is the rationale behind assessing batting performances.

I consider the statistics listed above as a reasonable metric for analyzing the performance of top order batsmen.

All the teams have played at least 12 games. PWI is the only team that has played 13. As per current rankings, KKR, DD, MI and RCB round off the top four spots. Let’s try to look into how does their success correlates with the performance of their top order.

For the purposes of this piece, top order will refer to the first three batsmen in the lineup. Middle order will refer to batsmen no. 4 & 5 in the order.

Here’s how the table appears when the teams are sorted based on the % of total runs of the entire team scored by the top order.

Image

The results show that three out of the top four teams continue to feature in top 4. The only new entry is RR, which wasn’t too far (5th in overall rankings) to begin with. Further, there is not much change in CSK, KXIP and PWI’s positions. This suggests that there is a reasonable correlation between the performance of top order and overall success of the teams. The major outliers to this trend would be MI and DC.

A couple of interesting revelations:

  • MI slips to the last spot. This suggests they do not truly depend on their top order for their success. This in spite of one Sachin Tendulkar, but I shall not dare to ramble along those lines.
  • DD top order accounts for nearly 2/3rd of the total runs scored by the team!.

A few other details are revealed when the teams are sorted out based on the total number of runs scored per inning by the entire team.`

Image

A few interesting observations right away:

  • Top teams like KKR and DD have now slipped to the bottom of the ladder. In fact, those two teams score nearly 20 runs fewer than RCB, which leads the pack. In a nutshell, while DD and KKR don’t score much (relatively speaking), they do rely on their top orders to set or chase a target quite heavily. This accentuates the value of Gautam Gambhir, Brendon McCullum, Virender Sehwag and Kevin Pietersen.
  • MI continues to sit at the bottom of the pile. So not only does MI score the fewest runs, their top order contributes the least towards their scores. So how a does team that performs so poorly with the bat manage to do well in the overall rankings? I’ll try to address that in more detail now.

The curious case of MI:

How is MI winning games in spite of horrendous scoring compared to the rest of the league? One of the possibilities is a strong middle order. The table below sorts the IPL teams based on the average runs scored by the middle order.

Image

No points for guessing which team has the BEST middle order in the business. It’s MI.  Here are a few other interesting observations:

  • Mumbai’s middle order contributes nearly TWICE as much to its team’s success when compared to Kolkata. This is further proven when one watches the performances of Rayudu, Pollard and the likes who have bailed Mumbai out many a times. The latest addition to this was the blitzkrieg from Dwayne Smith that flattened CSK.
  • Sorting teams based on average runs scored by the middle coincidentally sorts the teams based on the % runs contributed by no. 4 and no. 5 towards the total score. This further accentuates the contribution of the middle order of MI towards its success, particularly in close games.
  • The fact that KKR lies in the bottom of this list again accentuates how important the top order is for its success. Same rationale applies for RR that has been enjoying the success of Rahane and Dravid, and now Watson. The top order is critical for their success as well.

So I hope that I have been able to throw some light on the importance of the top order’s performance towards the success of a team. While this might be intuitive for some, analyzing statistically, nerding it up with figures and tables makes a lot more fun! Also, this could enable fantasy IPL players to choose certain players from particular teams. Too bad I won’t be getting a medal for this social service.

P.S: 3 matches have taken place since I’ve compiled this data. It would be great to put the above analysis to a litmus test.

Game 1: DD v/s DC

  • For DC, the top order scored 107/187 runs (~57.2%). While this sounds quite impressive for a team that is dead last in standings, this is still an AVERAGE if not slightly below average performance. The middle order scored 78/187 (~41.7%) runs. This is nearly twice their average production, which is probably why DC posted a significantly higher score than their season average.
  • For DD, it’s very simple. The top order won the game for them. They scored all the runs and flattened the opposition. This certainly holds true with the above analysis.

Game 2: RR v/s CSK

  • RR has relied quite a bit on it’s top order. In this game, they were fairly abysmal. They scored 26/126 (20.6%) of the team’s runs, which is barely 1/3rd of their season average! The middle order (Binny and Botha) bailed them out a little with 60 runs (47.6% of the total score). But this is a clear cut deviation from their season’s average trend.
  • CSK on the other hand, didn’t rely on their top order to win this game, which is in line with the above analysis. The top order scored only 42/127 runs (33.1%). This is below their season average of 49.8%. The middle order and the bottom order bailed them out big time and they were able to snatch a close game from RR’s hands.

Game 3: RCB v/s PWI

  • RCB batted first and their top order gave them an excellent start to set a platform for a competitive score. Chris Gayle, Tilakaratne Dilshan and Virat Kohli combined for 68.8% of the team’s runs. This is in line with their season’s trend.
  • PWI continued to showcase the fact that they have one of the worst top orders in the game This doesn’t have to do with poor quality batsmen as much as the number of times they’ve tinkered with their top order. They have changed their top order roughly 9 times in a span of 14 games. That is not the best approach towards a stable, established lineup. The game was practically over when they lost their entire top order for a mere 17 runs. The middle order did well by scoring 69/138 (50%) of the runs but it was clearly too much pressure to bail out such a poor show from the top order. The result was a crushing defeat.

So it appears that the above analysis was valid to a good extent on the games that transpired after compiling the data. As the title suggests, IPL does seem to be top heavy.

- Ajit Bhaskar.

(@ajit_bhaskar on Twitter)

Cricket Fan-tyutter-tastic!

I’ll start this post with a little trumpet-blowing and calling myself “active” on the social media “Twitter” over the past year and a half. I mostly spend my time ranting cricket or blocking ‘bots. Twitter, I found, is full of fellow cricket fans, who love the game a lot. And like every-thing that is made of people, there are categories to differentiate the people. I thought, a new twitterati must be given a guide to help understand who falls under what category, so he/she doesn’t end up following me and think Ravi Shastri is why I love cricket commentary.

Drum roll (OK, stop it, all 3 cricket teams I like get bowled out before your drum rolls can end.)…

1. Sachinists

Probably the most famous category of all. If you don’t know where you are, become this, you will have many to protect you. Recognized by periodical chants of “Sachin Is God”,even if he is not playing the game, even if India is not playing in the game. Sach is their life.
Identification marks – Sachin Tendulkar in their twitter DP, or “Sach is Life” written in their profile. Whatever the outcome of the game, they will assure you that SRT will win the world cup 2015. Along with his son (whose bio-data is also known quite well). Easier way to spot – the ones who switch off the TV or walk out of the television room when Tendulkar gets out. Since 1989..

2. The hard-core Sachin Fans

Slightly more cricket-ing nature ones involved here. Some are natural, others recruited from the Sachinist group. Crouching tiger, and hidden dragons them, will prowl at you and mince you to pieces if you say one word against His Highness. Writers, journalists, reporters, legends etc fear confrontation with this group.
Identification marks – twitter bruises on you. Sometimes filled with un-parliamentary words that are often used in parliaments. Also, they will tell me I attracted more views to this “over-rated” page, because I re-arranged the letters “N-i-c-a-h-s” in a particular manner and made it appear at multiple locations on this page to popularize it.
Affiliated group – “I Hate Steve Bucknor”.

3. The hard-core “Dada” fans

Like the title suggests, fans of the Prince of Calcutta, Saurav Ganguly make-up this space. This might sometimes need a requirement to learn Bengali, but mostly, they learn “gali” through conversations.
Identification marks – “I <3 Dada” written across their DP or bio, constant references to off-side, and first to enter and last to leave any conversation than contain the word “captain”.
Affiliated Group – “I Hate Greg Chappell”

4. Team India Haters

Mostly English speaking, residents of England or Australia, who contribute to the world of cricket by creating a healthy battle-like atmosphere. On twitter, of course.
Identification marks – lots of Vaseline, ironic references to ICC’s world rankings, “I love DRS” written in their BIO.
Affiliated group – “Indo-Pak Unity Group”

5. Sir Donald Bradman is the Greatest

In short – we have not seen him, but we know he is the best. Because all scriptures say so, and I am under no obligation to believe Barry Richards is better. Identification marks – voracious reader of books on cricketing history, nostalgic weep at the mention of John Arlott’s name, Tendulkar hasn’t impressed enough.
Affiliated Group – “Mathematical Group for Rounding of Numbers”.

6. No Way Bradman is the Greatest. I have proof.

Internet savvy, modern day, corporate ready ‘twitteratis’, more adept with the mouse and keyboard hitting permutation than enjoying the game. They can prove that Bradman doesn’t rank among the top-5 modern day cricketers in some way or the other.
Identification mark – internet browser’s home page is CricInfo Statsguru, sometimes stutter when asked “How many tests has Bradman played in India?”. Usually at the receiving end of the other groups mentioned above.
Affiliated Group – “Gayle Is A Legend”

7. The Highway

Media people, mostly television, self-appointed chief selector of Indian cricket on screen, who pick questions making round from twitter and sounding them on air as their own and then starting a non-stop ranting that makes you feel safe twitter can’t talk.
Identification marks – utterly confusing tweets on the game, which will later be superseded by the most popular voice doing the rounds.
Affiliated Group – “I Have No Clue About DRS, But Will Take A Side. And Change Sides Often”

8. New Age Fans

Ever so lively, bubbly fans, unaffected by the turmoils suffered by their cricketers at myriad foreign lands. They are why cricket still simmers even if it is out of gas.
Identification marks – Usually have their favourite player’s photograph in their display pic. Tweet about the game very rarely. Usually tweet in the same manner as – “Ooooooooooh, Raina looks cho cute” when he grins after misfielding or “Mahiiiii, I LOVE YOU” in a yellow jersey.
Affiliated group – “I play IPL cricket”

9. Regional

Based on geographical location of self or heart, these domestic keyboard warriors show good concern to their regional/domestic cricket. In-house fights prevail, most common (in India) being the ones from The Knowledgeable Chennai Crowd, the Mumbai’s “Khadoos Army”, Delhi and considerable volume of voices from other prominent Ranji teams’ fans. This usually ends with which We-Know-There-Is-No-Way-He-Will-Be-Selected player should have been selected.
Identification marks – constant outrage at governing board and leading cricket score lending sites at the non-existence of live-updates, plan to pen the book “How To Improve Domestic Cricket Structure”.
Affiliated Group – “IPL Is Ruining Cricket”

 

Of course, I might have missed some group. I am sorry to you, fellow of “Fans of Amla’s Beard”, “Monty Is A Legend” and “KP. Keiron Pollard. That.Is.All.” etcs. Will you be kind enough and help me by describing it in a comment below? Thanks.

We’re still friends, right?

Cloud Cuckoo Land

Based on a conversation between @sdayanand and @achettup

A ‘go-kart‘ once ‘flipped‘ over a cuckoo’s nest,
And the frightened ‘bird‘ flew away.
While the ‘fast go-kart drivers‘ were just ‘disappointed‘,
The ‘bird’ was thoroughly ‘embarrassed‘.

But then, the battle-hardened drivers had been around the block a few times,
For them, ‘age was only a number‘.
And with them, a ‘knee-jerk‘ ‘goodbye‘ would be unnecessary.
But, a ‘deep point‘ had already been made…

Alas and Alack! The real challenge was for those watching,
Who needed to be ‘mentally strong‘ and overcome a ‘mental block‘.
For, at 5am, although the ‘time wasn’t right‘,
They needed to be ‘Keyboard Saints‘.

All along, the ‘Bird complained‘ that
The ‘verbal abuse‘ had been thoroughly unnecessary.
Yet, he did get to a landmark, and when he did,
He ‘flipped‘ it and spoke of mothers and sisters!

In the end though, the last laugh was on the bird,
The Go-Kart remained ‘unlucky‘ and we were informed,
That in (some) cloud cuckoo land,
The argument/bird might circle in, on a ‘rank turner‘.

– Mohan

India tour of Aus. Report Card.

It’s your call now.

Checking cricket.

<An imaginary, yet realistic possibility of text commentary for the 2nd test between India and Australia>

Welcome to the live commentary of the 2nd test between India and Australia, live from the Sydney Cricket Ground, somewhere in Sydney, Sydney. The first test was heading to a gripping draw, but the Australian captain suddenly forfeited the match and handed India the win because Clarke thought Zaheer Khan’s hair-style deserved the win.

10.00 am: Toss : Mahendra Singh Dhoni wins the toss and elects to field first on a cloudy morning.

10.05 am: There is a bit of a delay here. The toss is being reviewed. The two captains, referee and Ravi Shastri have no idea if what they heard was right, so they have gone for the review. The match referee’s assistant calls up the Royal Australian Mint in Deakin/Canberra, feeds them with the details of the coin to confirm the heads and tails part of it. Ultra-motion replays have been played on the giant screen to figure out the outcome of the toss. It seems Dhoni had called it right and India will come on to bowl.

10.30 am: We have our first viewer comment here – “Hey, Sachin, please score that century in this test. I need some rest.”, and it comes from a person named Santa Claus.

10:55 am: Players are strolling into the field after the delay. Australian openers, debutants Steven Cazzulino and Wes Robinson make their way to the middle.

 

11.00 am: Zaheer Khan with the new ball. Three slips, and a gully to start the proceedings.

0.1 Khan to Robinson, no run, a good ball, shaping away from the left hander after pitching at good length outside the off stump.

Umpires have taken out their wind meters to check if the wind velocity is right for play to continue. Zaheer is standing behind Ishant Sharma to prevent the wind from affecting his hair-do.

After five minutes of discussion, we are good to go.

0.2 Khan to Robinson, no run, 108.6 mph, that ball came into the left hander Robinson, who was cramped for room, flashed at it, and it misses the inside edge by a whisker.

Replays show that because the ball had moved off the seam, it had missed the inside edge. and had it not, it would’ve taken the inside edge onto the stumps. The Falcon Eye showed how well the ball had come back in. Robinson in for some really fiery bowling, now.

0.3 Khan to Robinson, OUT, right as I say it, Zaheer Khan pitches this one on the off stump, the ball swings away from the driving left hander, takes the outside edge and Dravid completes a diving catch to his right to pluck the ball an inch or two above the ground. Robinson is leaving the ground dejectedly… Oh, wait.

The umpire has asked Robinson to wait, as he checks with the 3rd umpire for a no-ball. Robinson is waiting three-fourths the way to the pavilion, having a loud chatter with Shaun Marsh, who is padded up and waiting near the fence.

11.08 am: The 3rd umpire is checking the no-ball using the normal replay from all angles, Falcon Eye, hot-spot and ultra-motion cameras. This might take a while. I will be back in a few.

11.34 am: Folks, I’ve had a nap, walked my dog, solved today’s Sudoku, and the umpires are still on their walkie-talkies. Oh, the fourth umpire is on the field there, he might have sent some news. Sorry, he is just giving the umpires new sets of batteries to replace the ones that just died out. And the umpires are chatting again.

11.44 am: 3rd umpire is also checking for an edge there. The world seemed so sure about it. Nevertheless. And we have Tony Greig on air too – “Aowrrwrwrwrrw, wowwwwrrrrr! This is so wunderfullll…. That’s a white spot, that’s a black spot. That black spot is a glass of beer, that white spot is a hot-dog. Hot-Spot is awesome! BCCI don’t know where their head is. The Indians fans arrrrrre…”. Sorry, apparently, Greig snapped the cables in the commentary room when he flapped his hands around and tried to hi-five Mark Nicholas.

11.54 am:  Seeing how pointless the wait is, let’s take a look at what’s happening in the ground – There’s a football match going out there. From here, it seems like one team is the Dilli Boysz, against a team of Zaheer Khan, Ravichandran Ashwin, Umesh Yadav and MS Dhoni. Not sure why THAT play is held up, from here, it looks like Zaheer is holding up his hamstring. Again. Oh dear, this might be a very sad news for the Indian team and fans. I’m also avoiding a call from Mr Sunil Gavaskar right now. I think I know what he wants to tell.

At the far end, There is a huge crowd, silently listening to Rahul Dravid, who is reciting his Bradman Oration again for this lovely crowd.

Robinson is now having a video call with his mother. This 3G mobile phone video call is brought to you by Vodafone. Vodafone, our network follows you, out or not. Cazzulino is probably typing the next article for his creekinfo column. we’ll put it up during the tea break.

Sachin Tendulkar and VVS Laxman are playing “Poles of a Magnet“. Tendulkar goes to one section of the boundary, and attracts a huge crowd from across 4 stands in that arc. Then Laxman walks to where Tendulkar is standing, and the crowd, largely Australian, gets scared and runs away helter-skelter. Laxman and Tendulkar share a laugh.

12.14 pm: News is in that Zaheer Khan has recovered from his hamstring injury  and is fit to continue in the match. Also, he has also a new(er) hair-do. You all can watch it in a minute or fifteen.

12.22 pm: Great news – The umpires have arrived at a decision. Robinson has been given out after what seemed like eternity.

Zaheer is back to the top of his mark, Marsh marks his guard. Portions of crowd, panting after running, and those who were emotionally shaken by the speech gather themselves up and realise that there is a game going on, find their seats and await the…errr… 4th ball of the day.

0.4 Zaheer to Marsh….

 

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Over-usage/dependency on technology for trivial issues just to buy time on air seems such turn-off for a cricket lover. If speed off the bat, length of the six and degree of spin mattered to me so much, I would’ve rather been a mathematician.

We are nearing the day, when bowlers have to appeal even when the batsman is bowled, castled, stumps sent cartwheeling and bails flying. You never know what the umpires want to check. An utter waste of time, and completely meaningless frequency of checks.

 

“I know he is bowled. But is he out?”

- B.S. Chandrashekhar (during a New Zealand tour)

- Bagrat

Another Australian Tour…

I remember having followed only two of India’s previous tours to Australia, and those were pretty poorly done too.

When India toured Australia in that 2004-ish period, I was in school, in my danger zone of my school life – 10th standard. So, naturally, cable television was off, and I had only DD for any news. All India Radio wouldn’t do commentary. So, I’d have to wait till the last five minutes of the news to hear about the score and maybe a couple of clips from the session. I would then devour into the morning newspaper and gobble up two pages full of reports and articles and opinion columns in The Hindu. That pic of Ajit Agarkar, celebrating during his 6-wicket spell, I remember appeared in the middle of the page, and the crease of newspaper’s fold made the photo look awkward. Nevertheless, Adelaide win was reported live on DD News, well celebrated. Steve Waugh’s final test was well appreciated, though it prevented us from the win.

Next time ’round, I was in college, into my 2nd year of engineering, when India went to Australia in 2007/08. It was during the vacation that the Boxing Day test happened, and for some reason, I had missed most of it, watched highlights and got updates on mobile phones from pals who were watching, though. Can only remember Zak’s ball to Ponting, hitting the top of off after the ball from around the wicket seamed away just enough to tease Ponting’s bat’s edge to shame. I was in college for the Sydney test. Friends from around the country had just returned for the new semester. We had a lot of people to blame during the course of the match. You could’ve learnt 20 different swears in 15 languages had you been in that room I was watching the Sydney test. And the tension grew during the final session. My friend sitting next to me said, India playing with 3 wickets to protect, “Machhaan, if a wicket falls now, it will be very exciting!” I could’ve handled one wicket falling, but three was too large an amplification of the jinx. The Perth test was wonderful! Ishant’s my favourite bowler. He, like me is tall. I, like him, am a fast bowler. We both like unkempt long hair. It was a treat watching him bowl at Perth. Zipping the ball in and out. Owning Ponting. The Perth test was the only thing that made me voluntarily bunk a class in college. And the reward was Ishant’s brilliant 10 over spell ending with Ponting’s wicket. It was always coming. A power cut meant we couldn’t watch the end, and we only heard from our friends in other places when India wrapped up Australia’s irritating tail. Another anecdote from that series – Zak stopping a steaming Tait in his delivery stride to waste time and prevent another over at the end of day. That was simply the height of irritation for Tait.

And in less than a day’s time, India and Australia lock horns at Melbourne for the customary Boxing Day test to start the Border Gavaskar series. I have no clue what half the Australian team is. So many new names. My own lifestyle has changed drastically from 5-hours-a-day-class routine to 11-hours-a-day office routine. I have missed so much cricket in the last 4 months that I continue to have the problem in telling Umesh Yadav from Varun Aaron. India failed miserably in England, made up a bit against the West Indies at home. I learn that Australia have been average at best in their last two series ( SA, NZ). So, per me, what should’ve been a marquee series is just another series. A lot of name and fame and history and pride attached to it, but much of a fight in store. There might be some good tests, yes. But if we are calling the recent Australian tests are good ones, in which mediocre performances led to gripping results, that wouldn’t be good on an absolute scale in comparison to what we’ve had in previous tours.

Australian team has been getting a facelift every other series. Bowlers in both teams are getting injured on day-to-day basis. Ponting, Sachin, Dravid, Laxman are all having their last meet, I’d guess. One or more may be having their last series too. I’ve stayed away from most analysis, match-ups, talks, build-ups et all. I don’t want to expect anything now, for, reality is far from my expectations nowadays. This will like the Australian tours before 2003-04, when as a kid I’d sit with my dad on wintry mornings, and just watch the players in white, on the green fields, the red ball chasing away seagulls, and the sweet sound of bat on ball with the voice of Richie Benaud on the mic. I remember nothing from those tours, honestly.

As 26th of December creeps up, I’ve no idea if I’d be locked between priorities. NBA starts at the same time. A lot of switching between channels, or watching on different screens will or might happen, depending upon my laziness.

Here’s hoping this tour is better than what it seems to be.

- Bagrat

Sacrilege Of The Mucks With The Bat

Last weekend, I was  at a cricket ground, aspiring for a spot into my company’s cricket team/squad. The selection trials were on. About 80 had registered, and about 45 had shown up, some were in formals too (I mean shirts and trousers and leather shoes). Batsmen batted, bowlers bowled. I had checked the box next to “Bowling” on the ‘Application Form’, and hence was mildly surprised when I was asked to pad up to bat. I went to the caller and told him that I didn’t ask for it. I was told I was the only one who didn’t opt for it, so they thought it was a printing mistake. I replied “Ah well, don’t expect much out of me. I’m a Muralitharan with the bat.” True to my word, I hoicked a couple to cow corner, got hit on pad 4 times, drove thrice, pulled once and got bowled twice (once while playing a back foot flick to a yorker, and once while dancing down the track). God knows where my front foot was. With an awkward smile, I returned to get rid of the gears…

I’ve been a bowler, and I always want to remain so. Even if my valiant attempt at a shot at the company’s team might mean the end of red cherry cricket. And I’ve always enjoyed watching cricketers like me go on to bat. It’s entertaining. I’ve enjoyed watching Chris Martin, he’s a legend in our circles. Bowl your heart out, cannot care less for the willow handling. Muralitharan was a smiling assassin even when he came out to bat. One would think he’s driving away bees if you watched him bat. And he would wear a silly smile on his face. He once had a runner to assist him, and he started off to run when edged the ball behind the keeper. And then jumped and dove back into the crease, leaving everybody chuckling in laughter.

People like them, the real “Mucks with the Bat”, are a dying breed. Cricket now demands that even the bowlers are able enough to bat and see a team through. Top order batsmen get out for cheap, and tail enders have to bail them out by putting up a decent score which would give themselves something to bowl at. Everyone get’s a “He’s no muck with the bat” from Sunil Gavaskar. In the era before, bowlers would tell the batsmen “give us xyz runs to bowl at and we will manage within that.” Nowadays, batsmen are casual enough to risk their wicket and ask for the tail to do mop things up.

All that has given rise to more number of all-rounders. Bowlers who can bat, more than batsmen who can bowl. Some have completely changed their resume. Shoaib Malik, Tillekeratne Dilshan were spinners to start with, are now more renowned for their batting. Today, bowlers are expected to bat. And bat for long. And score. When a billion people expect the last three names on the batting card to do something which the eight above must’ve already done, something seemed out of sorts. Not new, the adulteration has been happening for a while.

No, we don’t undermine batting. We love to bat.  But in our own way. Glenn McGrath, Courtney Walsh were all very serious about their batting. Their averages may speak otherwise. It was some kind of kill-joy pleasure, when someone like MacGill or Hoggard would walk out and just stay put for half and hour, without scoring. Just, not get out. Frustrate the opponent. Enjoy their frustration. Or conversely, like the legend Murali mentioned above, swing. Frustrate your own teammate(s).

We don’t know which direction the front foot must face while driving the ball, we don’t know how to remove the bottom hand away to play with soft hands. We know that a bat is given to protect us from getting out, and, if imagination permits, score runs.

In the ongoing India vs West Indies ODI series, there were three games that had the 10th wicket pair hogging the limelight. In one, we saw the no.10 and no.11 take India to a victory. In two others, there were 10th wicket partnerships of more than fifty! Batting was good, yes… But that’s the job of the top order. When was the last time you saw Indian batsmen coming in at no.10 and no.11 average 20 in List-A cricket?

Once the 7th wicket is gone, it should be time for unadulterated entertainment. Commentators must shut up and not pass a single comment about the batting technique. Frankly, the French cut is our favourite shot. Anything else is out of pure luck.

We gave the world moments some wonderful moments. Last year, we saw Pragyan Ojha performing a Harry Houdini at Mohali. He was out lbw, but the umpire thought otherwise, and soon after, ball somehow ran to fine leg, and Ojha ran, ran India to victory. And beyond that, the most entertaining part of Australia’s win over South Africa at Johannesburg three weeks ago was the fifteen minutes worth live images after every other ball, bowled after the fall of Australia’s 8th wicket, of the no.11 batsman in the dressing room, Nathan Lyon. He was sweating profusely, eyes open wide, mouth gaping, heart thumping… And he was not even on the field yet.

Ojha won it for India. Australia won it for Nathan Lyon.

Batsmen score centuries every day. Now they even score double centuries in ODIs. Runs are now available in every vending machine of a cricket pitch. But even in this era, we have legends like Chris Martin, who received the biggest cheer of the match from the crowd at Hamilton when he completed his 100th run of his career in his 60th test.

Mucks with the bat.

Chris Martin - A lot of slip between the bat and the hip.

- Bagrat

(image courtesy ABC News )

Irritation Maximum – Ten Cricket

“And the umpire has gone to the…… Kyunki har ek friend zaroori hota hai…”

No, though it may be that way, I’m not talking about players befriending the umpires. I’m talking about what the Indian viewers watching the SAvAUS series were put through. After a horrible experience of watching India’s tour of South Africa last winter, TEN CRICKET put us through agony yet again.

During the SAvIND, there were excessive, I mean,  HOLD YOUR HEADS TOGETHER OFF BEFORE YOUR TEMPER EXPLODES THROUGH YOUR SKULL EXCESSIVE number of advertisements on screen, ruining half the possible pleasures of watching the game. And to make things worse, the money licking channel would snap the video before the cricket could allow it. ( Piece -1, Piece-2, both via cricinfo)

This time, Australia’s tour of South Africa, nothing much different. As it is, the videos were late by 2 minutes, like as if it swam across the Indian ocean to reach out TV sets. Wickets would fall and boundaries were hit and my mobile beeped the news before Ten Cricket carried the visuals of the ball before the one on which the event happened. That was sad at a whole different level. But if I cut all my contacts with the social networking, I might watch the match live.

I might.

But then, His Highness Sir Lord Ten Cricket had to bring along his favourite pig along – advertisements. It was like as if Mr Ten Cricket was in constant hurry. Drinking money all the time, wanting to pee, and close the zipper before his weewee could finish the business.

I watched the third sessions on all days, and only once do I remember watching an event being shown all through till the end of the action – Haddin walking till the ropes after being dismissed in the last session of last day of the last test. Ignoring that mistake (right?), Ten Cricket would snap the video RIGHT after the ball hit the bat. The bowler would be running in to bowl the next over by the time the clutches of the blood sucking advertisements would loosen. And only then we would figure out if there was a run, or a wicket or a dot, or a fist fight in the last ball of the previous over.

I was in office when this occurred, but I think it is not hard for me to imagine it, when someone tweeted – “The third umpire goes upstairs, and…. it’s an advertisement break!”

This Mr Ten Cricket can’t wait for a couple of minutes to watch the verdict from the third umpire. Mr Ten Cricket could’ve peed in his pants if he wanted to pee that much. If anyone gets injured, Mr Ten Cricket’s army of advertisements will appear as soon as the physio gets off his seat. You might wonder where the button is, on the physio’s chair? Drinks break would see the ads come before the umpire signals drinks. Mr Ten Cricket signals drinks.

If I see an ad break go for so long, I keep thinking that it is either drinks break or a fall of a wicket (depending on when I see that string of advertisements). And it’s become so frustrating that I can’t remember what advertisements came in. Ok, one I can remember – Irfan Khan in one Vodafone ad. Clearly feeding me more ads when I’m not hungry hasn’t worked in your favour, Mr Ten Cricket (cc: whoever sent him that fodder).

All this for what? Profit? If Ten Cricket’s coverage in the Middle East can save the nuisance, why not in India? How do other channels manage to make enough money from neutral series and stay afloat, with quality? I didn’t find this during the Ashes on Espn-Star Network. A sports coverage which has no time or money to cover the nuances of its art has no business continuing doing so. I will take any other feasible alternative to watch a cropped coverage of the game.

Quoting the basket legend Michael Jordan’s retort to his team owner, during from 1998-99 lock-out period, where the owners locked players out from playing games because they couldn’t make enough money from the NBA season-

“If you can’t make make profit, you should sell the team.”

TEN CRICKADThe Ad comes in, before Cricket could end.

A foolish cricket fan

Two test matches have been played in the India-West Indies series, and I’m yet to watch a single ball live. Last time they were in India, my dad was able to watch some days’ play live, the ones on weekend. I have myself to blame for missing day-1of first test, yes, but now, I have to pray for the Bombay game to reach day-5 to catch a glimpse of a game live.

How hard is it to organize a game that can ease into the weekends and then finish on a Monday or a Tuesday? BCCI go against the government’s Sports Bill, but the 9-to-5 schedule of test matches on weekdays makes it look like an Indian governmental functionary than many others actually do. Sarkari kaam…

I was atleast able to follow the game by some mean. People come to me a day or two after the test asking how much XYZ scored, or, how much lead India has over West Indies now.  Cricket is slowly slipping out of people’s mind. Such a scheduling is pushing us fans away from the game. In other words, it is not attracting us towards it.

Also found smaller turn outs in stadia during both the English ODI and the WI test series. Myriad explanations and justifications came up for that. Cricket burn out, no-match series, “boring” series (???), and one more that caught my eye – the game is driven more by the television audience. People want to stay home and watch the game rather than go to the stadium. Have heard “when I can watch it here, why would I want to go all the way there and watch it?” Here’s my retort to them – “Why go on a vacation to any tourist spot if you can watch videos and photos of the place sitting at home?”

It was a horrible spring/summer of 1999, after which my family moved to Chennai. I joined my new school 2 months after it had started. In my first month in the new city, I learnt that my school had thrown holidays when Pakistan played the test there. Only one test had uninterrupted play since that, and that game had more security personnel than spectators (vs England, 2008). Never heard any other place giving anything remotely close to a holiday for a game played in the city. I don’t expect them to. I might have ten years ago, not today. It’s how the game has gone. Value for the game has decreased from a festival it once was to an ignorable passing vehicle today.

Test cricket attendance was decreasing, slowly, but I think somewhere recently it fell like an avalanche. Earlier, test and one-dayers existed. It wasn’t tough for people to go for test matches. Today, in comparison to those times, the pay, transport, roads, connectivity, communication and access have improved, but it somehow got tougher for people to go for test matches. I may be a fool in understanding this, but I would like to remain so.

T20 came in. Supposedly the game has been blessed with new fans with the arrival of the T20s. I hope that is true, I’m not yet convinced about that myself. Last night, I was called “shameless” for watching test cricket (SAvAUS, 2nd test, day-2, Steyn and Tahir bowling). Not the first such remark I’ve faced. Rolling back a couple of years, when my college mates were about to turn into bed, my alarm woke me up. It was 3:15 am, and I was heading to the TV room to watch India’s first test match in NZ. I was laughed at. Earlier this year, I “troubled” the sleeping watchman (who had absolutely no business sleeping when he must be doing his job) to watch Pakistan’s tour of West Indies. The college then locked the room permanently which made me miss watching on TV most of India’s tour of West Indies and the English tour. Internet streaming is only a consolation.

“Shameless”? Really? When I quack about dislike of T20s and ‘IPL’ cricket, or bite those fans, I’m a fool, a stubborn narrow minded idiot, but these people who can call me such must be saints, I guess. I have trained myself to ignore “Abbey saale, test match kaun dekhta hai?” comments, 5 years after standing on a dais and begging my class of 73 to give a little bit more importance to test cricket in my first year of college. (That was before ICL or IPL hit any of us.) But of course, I was a fool…

Jumping back to the India-WI series, I caught up with highlights of all days’ play (except last day’s of both test match), and I fail to see what’s keeping the BCCI with the commentators that were on there. Is there no way we can give them a feedback about them? It was easier to watch highlights, since most of their comments would not register on my mind, or, Yadav’s  innocent celebration would divert my attention, or Darren Bravo would make me nostalgic. It all helped, yes. Having heard those muppets over the years, why hasn’t there been any change at all? It’s something I rant about a lot, because a commentator is one of the three things I want to become one day. Atleast, wanted to. I would prefer radio commentary over television commentary, though. No regrets, I became of the other two things I dreamt.

I love this game, but my love was never tried and tested so much. Never before have I felt so distant from the game in my life.

-Bagrat