Author Archives: bagrat15

Cricket Fan-tyutter-tastic!

Posted on 23 February 2012 | 11 Comments

I’ll start this post with a little trumpet-blowing and calling myself “active” on the social media “Twitter” over the past year and a half. I mostly spend my time ranting cricket or blocking ‘bots. Twitter, I found, is full of fellow cricket fans, who love the game a lot. And like every-thing that is made of people, there are categories to differentiate the people. I thought, a new twitterati must be given a guide to help understand who falls under what category, so he/she doesn’t end up following me and think Ravi Shastri is why I love cricket commentary.

Drum roll (OK, stop it, all 3 cricket teams I like get bowled out before your drum rolls can end.)…

1. Sachinists

Probably the most famous category of all. If you don’t know where you are, become this, you will have many to protect you. Recognized by periodical chants of “Sachin Is God”,even if he is not playing the game, even if India is not playing in the game. Sach is their life.
Identification marks – Sachin Tendulkar in their twitter DP, or “Sach is Life” written in their profile. Whatever the outcome of the game, they will assure you that SRT will win the world cup 2015. Along with his son (whose bio-data is also known quite well). Easier way to spot – the ones who switch off the TV or walk out of the television room when Tendulkar gets out. Since 1989..

2. The hard-core Sachin Fans

Slightly more cricket-ing nature ones involved here. Some are natural, others recruited from the Sachinist group. Crouching tiger, and hidden dragons them, will prowl at you and mince you to pieces if you say one word against His Highness. Writers, journalists, reporters, legends etc fear confrontation with this group.
Identification marks – twitter bruises on you. Sometimes filled with un-parliamentary words that are often used in parliaments. Also, they will tell me I attracted more views to this “over-rated” page, because I re-arranged the letters “N-i-c-a-h-s” in a particular manner and made it appear at multiple locations on this page to popularize it.
Affiliated group – “I Hate Steve Bucknor”.

3. The hard-core “Dada” fans

Like the title suggests, fans of the Prince of Calcutta, Saurav Ganguly make-up this space. This might sometimes need a requirement to learn Bengali, but mostly, they learn “gali” through conversations.
Identification marks – “I <3 Dada” written across their DP or bio, constant references to off-side, and first to enter and last to leave any conversation than contain the word “captain”.
Affiliated Group – “I Hate Greg Chappell”

4. Team India Haters

Mostly English speaking, residents of England or Australia, who contribute to the world of cricket by creating a healthy battle-like atmosphere. On twitter, of course.
Identification marks – lots of Vaseline, ironic references to ICC’s world rankings, “I love DRS” written in their BIO.
Affiliated group – “Indo-Pak Unity Group”

5. Sir Donald Bradman is the Greatest

In short – we have not seen him, but we know he is the best. Because all scriptures say so, and I am under no obligation to believe Barry Richards is better. Identification marks – voracious reader of books on cricketing history, nostalgic weep at the mention of John Arlott’s name, Tendulkar hasn’t impressed enough.
Affiliated Group – “Mathematical Group for Rounding of Numbers”.

6. No Way Bradman is the Greatest. I have proof.

Internet savvy, modern day, corporate ready ‘twitteratis’, more adept with the mouse and keyboard hitting permutation than enjoying the game. They can prove that Bradman doesn’t rank among the top-5 modern day cricketers in some way or the other.
Identification mark – internet browser’s home page is CricInfo Statsguru, sometimes stutter when asked “How many tests has Bradman played in India?”. Usually at the receiving end of the other groups mentioned above.
Affiliated Group – “Gayle Is A Legend”

7. The Highway

Media people, mostly television, self-appointed chief selector of Indian cricket on screen, who pick questions making round from twitter and sounding them on air as their own and then starting a non-stop ranting that makes you feel safe twitter can’t talk.
Identification marks – utterly confusing tweets on the game, which will later be superseded by the most popular voice doing the rounds.
Affiliated Group – “I Have No Clue About DRS, But Will Take A Side. And Change Sides Often”

8. New Age Fans

Ever so lively, bubbly fans, unaffected by the turmoils suffered by their cricketers at myriad foreign lands. They are why cricket still simmers even if it is out of gas.
Identification marks – Usually have their favourite player’s photograph in their display pic. Tweet about the game very rarely. Usually tweet in the same manner as – “Ooooooooooh, Raina looks cho cute” when he grins after misfielding or “Mahiiiii, I LOVE YOU” in a yellow jersey.
Affiliated group – “I play IPL cricket”

9. Regional

Based on geographical location of self or heart, these domestic keyboard warriors show good concern to their regional/domestic cricket. In-house fights prevail, most common (in India) being the ones from The Knowledgeable Chennai Crowd, the Mumbai’s “Khadoos Army”, Delhi and considerable volume of voices from other prominent Ranji teams’ fans. This usually ends with which We-Know-There-Is-No-Way-He-Will-Be-Selected player should have been selected.
Identification marks – constant outrage at governing board and leading cricket score lending sites at the non-existence of live-updates, plan to pen the book “How To Improve Domestic Cricket Structure”.
Affiliated Group – “IPL Is Ruining Cricket”

 

Of course, I might have missed some group. I am sorry to you, fellow of “Fans of Amla’s Beard”, “Monty Is A Legend” and “KP. Keiron Pollard. That.Is.All.” etcs. Will you be kind enough and help me by describing it in a comment below? Thanks.

We’re still friends, right?

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India tour of Aus. Report Card.

Posted on 26 January 2012 | 6 Comments

It’s your call now.

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Checking cricket.

Posted on 28 December 2011 | 5 Comments

<An imaginary, yet realistic possibility of text commentary for the 2nd test between India and Australia>

Welcome to the live commentary of the 2nd test between India and Australia, live from the Sydney Cricket Ground, somewhere in Sydney, Sydney. The first test was heading to a gripping draw, but the Australian captain suddenly forfeited the match and handed India the win because Clarke thought Zaheer Khan’s hair-style deserved the win.

10.00 am: Toss : Mahendra Singh Dhoni wins the toss and elects to field first on a cloudy morning.

10.05 am: There is a bit of a delay here. The toss is being reviewed. The two captains, referee and Ravi Shastri have no idea if what they heard was right, so they have gone for the review. The match referee’s assistant calls up the Royal Australian Mint in Deakin/Canberra, feeds them with the details of the coin to confirm the heads and tails part of it. Ultra-motion replays have been played on the giant screen to figure out the outcome of the toss. It seems Dhoni had called it right and India will come on to bowl.

10.30 am: We have our first viewer comment here – “Hey, Sachin, please score that century in this test. I need some rest.”, and it comes from a person named Santa Claus.

10:55 am: Players are strolling into the field after the delay. Australian openers, debutants Steven Cazzulino and Wes Robinson make their way to the middle.

 

11.00 am: Zaheer Khan with the new ball. Three slips, and a gully to start the proceedings.

0.1 Khan to Robinson, no run, a good ball, shaping away from the left hander after pitching at good length outside the off stump.

Umpires have taken out their wind meters to check if the wind velocity is right for play to continue. Zaheer is standing behind Ishant Sharma to prevent the wind from affecting his hair-do.

After five minutes of discussion, we are good to go.

0.2 Khan to Robinson, no run, 108.6 mph, that ball came into the left hander Robinson, who was cramped for room, flashed at it, and it misses the inside edge by a whisker.

Replays show that because the ball had moved off the seam, it had missed the inside edge. and had it not, it would’ve taken the inside edge onto the stumps. The Falcon Eye showed how well the ball had come back in. Robinson in for some really fiery bowling, now.

0.3 Khan to Robinson, OUT, right as I say it, Zaheer Khan pitches this one on the off stump, the ball swings away from the driving left hander, takes the outside edge and Dravid completes a diving catch to his right to pluck the ball an inch or two above the ground. Robinson is leaving the ground dejectedly… Oh, wait.

The umpire has asked Robinson to wait, as he checks with the 3rd umpire for a no-ball. Robinson is waiting three-fourths the way to the pavilion, having a loud chatter with Shaun Marsh, who is padded up and waiting near the fence.

11.08 am: The 3rd umpire is checking the no-ball using the normal replay from all angles, Falcon Eye, hot-spot and ultra-motion cameras. This might take a while. I will be back in a few.

11.34 am: Folks, I’ve had a nap, walked my dog, solved today’s Sudoku, and the umpires are still on their walkie-talkies. Oh, the fourth umpire is on the field there, he might have sent some news. Sorry, he is just giving the umpires new sets of batteries to replace the ones that just died out. And the umpires are chatting again.

11.44 am: 3rd umpire is also checking for an edge there. The world seemed so sure about it. Nevertheless. And we have Tony Greig on air too – “Aowrrwrwrwrrw, wowwwwrrrrr! This is so wunderfullll…. That’s a white spot, that’s a black spot. That black spot is a glass of beer, that white spot is a hot-dog. Hot-Spot is awesome! BCCI don’t know where their head is. The Indians fans arrrrrre…”. Sorry, apparently, Greig snapped the cables in the commentary room when he flapped his hands around and tried to hi-five Mark Nicholas.

11.54 am:  Seeing how pointless the wait is, let’s take a look at what’s happening in the ground – There’s a football match going out there. From here, it seems like one team is the Dilli Boysz, against a team of Zaheer Khan, Ravichandran Ashwin, Umesh Yadav and MS Dhoni. Not sure why THAT play is held up, from here, it looks like Zaheer is holding up his hamstring. Again. Oh dear, this might be a very sad news for the Indian team and fans. I’m also avoiding a call from Mr Sunil Gavaskar right now. I think I know what he wants to tell.

At the far end, There is a huge crowd, silently listening to Rahul Dravid, who is reciting his Bradman Oration again for this lovely crowd.

Robinson is now having a video call with his mother. This 3G mobile phone video call is brought to you by Vodafone. Vodafone, our network follows you, out or not. Cazzulino is probably typing the next article for his creekinfo column. we’ll put it up during the tea break.

Sachin Tendulkar and VVS Laxman are playing “Poles of a Magnet“. Tendulkar goes to one section of the boundary, and attracts a huge crowd from across 4 stands in that arc. Then Laxman walks to where Tendulkar is standing, and the crowd, largely Australian, gets scared and runs away helter-skelter. Laxman and Tendulkar share a laugh.

12.14 pm: News is in that Zaheer Khan has recovered from his hamstring injury  and is fit to continue in the match. Also, he has also a new(er) hair-do. You all can watch it in a minute or fifteen.

12.22 pm: Great news – The umpires have arrived at a decision. Robinson has been given out after what seemed like eternity.

Zaheer is back to the top of his mark, Marsh marks his guard. Portions of crowd, panting after running, and those who were emotionally shaken by the speech gather themselves up and realise that there is a game going on, find their seats and await the…errr… 4th ball of the day.

0.4 Zaheer to Marsh….

 

.
.
.

Over-usage/dependency on technology for trivial issues just to buy time on air seems such turn-off for a cricket lover. If speed off the bat, length of the six and degree of spin mattered to me so much, I would’ve rather been a mathematician.

We are nearing the day, when bowlers have to appeal even when the batsman is bowled, castled, stumps sent cartwheeling and bails flying. You never know what the umpires want to check. An utter waste of time, and completely meaningless frequency of checks.

 

“I know he is bowled. But is he out?”

- B.S. Chandrashekhar (during a New Zealand tour)

- Bagrat

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Another Australian Tour…

Posted on 25 December 2011 | 2 Comments

I remember having followed only two of India’s previous tours to Australia, and those were pretty poorly done too.

When India toured Australia in that 2004-ish period, I was in school, in my danger zone of my school life – 10th standard. So, naturally, cable television was off, and I had only DD for any news. All India Radio wouldn’t do commentary. So, I’d have to wait till the last five minutes of the news to hear about the score and maybe a couple of clips from the session. I would then devour into the morning newspaper and gobble up two pages full of reports and articles and opinion columns in The Hindu. That pic of Ajit Agarkar, celebrating during his 6-wicket spell, I remember appeared in the middle of the page, and the crease of newspaper’s fold made the photo look awkward. Nevertheless, Adelaide win was reported live on DD News, well celebrated. Steve Waugh’s final test was well appreciated, though it prevented us from the win.

Next time ’round, I was in college, into my 2nd year of engineering, when India went to Australia in 2007/08. It was during the vacation that the Boxing Day test happened, and for some reason, I had missed most of it, watched highlights and got updates on mobile phones from pals who were watching, though. Can only remember Zak’s ball to Ponting, hitting the top of off after the ball from around the wicket seamed away just enough to tease Ponting’s bat’s edge to shame. I was in college for the Sydney test. Friends from around the country had just returned for the new semester. We had a lot of people to blame during the course of the match. You could’ve learnt 20 different swears in 15 languages had you been in that room I was watching the Sydney test. And the tension grew during the final session. My friend sitting next to me said, India playing with 3 wickets to protect, “Machhaan, if a wicket falls now, it will be very exciting!” I could’ve handled one wicket falling, but three was too large an amplification of the jinx. The Perth test was wonderful! Ishant’s my favourite bowler. He, like me is tall. I, like him, am a fast bowler. We both like unkempt long hair. It was a treat watching him bowl at Perth. Zipping the ball in and out. Owning Ponting. The Perth test was the only thing that made me voluntarily bunk a class in college. And the reward was Ishant’s brilliant 10 over spell ending with Ponting’s wicket. It was always coming. A power cut meant we couldn’t watch the end, and we only heard from our friends in other places when India wrapped up Australia’s irritating tail. Another anecdote from that series – Zak stopping a steaming Tait in his delivery stride to waste time and prevent another over at the end of day. That was simply the height of irritation for Tait.

And in less than a day’s time, India and Australia lock horns at Melbourne for the customary Boxing Day test to start the Border Gavaskar series. I have no clue what half the Australian team is. So many new names. My own lifestyle has changed drastically from 5-hours-a-day-class routine to 11-hours-a-day office routine. I have missed so much cricket in the last 4 months that I continue to have the problem in telling Umesh Yadav from Varun Aaron. India failed miserably in England, made up a bit against the West Indies at home. I learn that Australia have been average at best in their last two series ( SA, NZ). So, per me, what should’ve been a marquee series is just another series. A lot of name and fame and history and pride attached to it, but much of a fight in store. There might be some good tests, yes. But if we are calling the recent Australian tests are good ones, in which mediocre performances led to gripping results, that wouldn’t be good on an absolute scale in comparison to what we’ve had in previous tours.

Australian team has been getting a facelift every other series. Bowlers in both teams are getting injured on day-to-day basis. Ponting, Sachin, Dravid, Laxman are all having their last meet, I’d guess. One or more may be having their last series too. I’ve stayed away from most analysis, match-ups, talks, build-ups et all. I don’t want to expect anything now, for, reality is far from my expectations nowadays. This will like the Australian tours before 2003-04, when as a kid I’d sit with my dad on wintry mornings, and just watch the players in white, on the green fields, the red ball chasing away seagulls, and the sweet sound of bat on ball with the voice of Richie Benaud on the mic. I remember nothing from those tours, honestly.

As 26th of December creeps up, I’ve no idea if I’d be locked between priorities. NBA starts at the same time. A lot of switching between channels, or watching on different screens will or might happen, depending upon my laziness.

Here’s hoping this tour is better than what it seems to be.

- Bagrat

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Sacrilege Of The Mucks With The Bat

Posted on 10 December 2011 | 3 Comments

Last weekend, I was  at a cricket ground, aspiring for a spot into my company’s cricket team/squad. The selection trials were on. About 80 had registered, and about 45 had shown up, some were in formals too (I mean shirts and trousers and leather shoes). Batsmen batted, bowlers bowled. I had checked the box next to “Bowling” on the ‘Application Form’, and hence was mildly surprised when I was asked to pad up to bat. I went to the caller and told him that I didn’t ask for it. I was told I was the only one who didn’t opt for it, so they thought it was a printing mistake. I replied “Ah well, don’t expect much out of me. I’m a Muralitharan with the bat.” True to my word, I hoicked a couple to cow corner, got hit on pad 4 times, drove thrice, pulled once and got bowled twice (once while playing a back foot flick to a yorker, and once while dancing down the track). God knows where my front foot was. With an awkward smile, I returned to get rid of the gears…

I’ve been a bowler, and I always want to remain so. Even if my valiant attempt at a shot at the company’s team might mean the end of red cherry cricket. And I’ve always enjoyed watching cricketers like me go on to bat. It’s entertaining. I’ve enjoyed watching Chris Martin, he’s a legend in our circles. Bowl your heart out, cannot care less for the willow handling. Muralitharan was a smiling assassin even when he came out to bat. One would think he’s driving away bees if you watched him bat. And he would wear a silly smile on his face. He once had a runner to assist him, and he started off to run when edged the ball behind the keeper. And then jumped and dove back into the crease, leaving everybody chuckling in laughter.

People like them, the real “Mucks with the Bat”, are a dying breed. Cricket now demands that even the bowlers are able enough to bat and see a team through. Top order batsmen get out for cheap, and tail enders have to bail them out by putting up a decent score which would give themselves something to bowl at. Everyone get’s a “He’s no muck with the bat” from Sunil Gavaskar. In the era before, bowlers would tell the batsmen “give us xyz runs to bowl at and we will manage within that.” Nowadays, batsmen are casual enough to risk their wicket and ask for the tail to do mop things up.

All that has given rise to more number of all-rounders. Bowlers who can bat, more than batsmen who can bowl. Some have completely changed their resume. Shoaib Malik, Tillekeratne Dilshan were spinners to start with, are now more renowned for their batting. Today, bowlers are expected to bat. And bat for long. And score. When a billion people expect the last three names on the batting card to do something which the eight above must’ve already done, something seemed out of sorts. Not new, the adulteration has been happening for a while.

No, we don’t undermine batting. We love to bat.  But in our own way. Glenn McGrath, Courtney Walsh were all very serious about their batting. Their averages may speak otherwise. It was some kind of kill-joy pleasure, when someone like MacGill or Hoggard would walk out and just stay put for half and hour, without scoring. Just, not get out. Frustrate the opponent. Enjoy their frustration. Or conversely, like the legend Murali mentioned above, swing. Frustrate your own teammate(s).

We don’t know which direction the front foot must face while driving the ball, we don’t know how to remove the bottom hand away to play with soft hands. We know that a bat is given to protect us from getting out, and, if imagination permits, score runs.

In the ongoing India vs West Indies ODI series, there were three games that had the 10th wicket pair hogging the limelight. In one, we saw the no.10 and no.11 take India to a victory. In two others, there were 10th wicket partnerships of more than fifty! Batting was good, yes… But that’s the job of the top order. When was the last time you saw Indian batsmen coming in at no.10 and no.11 average 20 in List-A cricket?

Once the 7th wicket is gone, it should be time for unadulterated entertainment. Commentators must shut up and not pass a single comment about the batting technique. Frankly, the French cut is our favourite shot. Anything else is out of pure luck.

We gave the world moments some wonderful moments. Last year, we saw Pragyan Ojha performing a Harry Houdini at Mohali. He was out lbw, but the umpire thought otherwise, and soon after, ball somehow ran to fine leg, and Ojha ran, ran India to victory. And beyond that, the most entertaining part of Australia’s win over South Africa at Johannesburg three weeks ago was the fifteen minutes worth live images after every other ball, bowled after the fall of Australia’s 8th wicket, of the no.11 batsman in the dressing room, Nathan Lyon. He was sweating profusely, eyes open wide, mouth gaping, heart thumping… And he was not even on the field yet.

Ojha won it for India. Australia won it for Nathan Lyon.

Batsmen score centuries every day. Now they even score double centuries in ODIs. Runs are now available in every vending machine of a cricket pitch. But even in this era, we have legends like Chris Martin, who received the biggest cheer of the match from the crowd at Hamilton when he completed his 100th run of his career in his 60th test.

Mucks with the bat.

Chris Martin - A lot of slip between the bat and the hip.

- Bagrat

(image courtesy ABC News )

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Irritation Maximum – Ten Cricket

Posted on 22 November 2011 | 3 Comments

“And the umpire has gone to the…… Kyunki har ek friend zaroori hota hai…”

No, though it may be that way, I’m not talking about players befriending the umpires. I’m talking about what the Indian viewers watching the SAvAUS series were put through. After a horrible experience of watching India’s tour of South Africa last winter, TEN CRICKET put us through agony yet again.

During the SAvIND, there were excessive, I mean,  HOLD YOUR HEADS TOGETHER OFF BEFORE YOUR TEMPER EXPLODES THROUGH YOUR SKULL EXCESSIVE number of advertisements on screen, ruining half the possible pleasures of watching the game. And to make things worse, the money licking channel would snap the video before the cricket could allow it. ( Piece -1, Piece-2, both via cricinfo)

This time, Australia’s tour of South Africa, nothing much different. As it is, the videos were late by 2 minutes, like as if it swam across the Indian ocean to reach out TV sets. Wickets would fall and boundaries were hit and my mobile beeped the news before Ten Cricket carried the visuals of the ball before the one on which the event happened. That was sad at a whole different level. But if I cut all my contacts with the social networking, I might watch the match live.

I might.

But then, His Highness Sir Lord Ten Cricket had to bring along his favourite pig along – advertisements. It was like as if Mr Ten Cricket was in constant hurry. Drinking money all the time, wanting to pee, and close the zipper before his weewee could finish the business.

I watched the third sessions on all days, and only once do I remember watching an event being shown all through till the end of the action – Haddin walking till the ropes after being dismissed in the last session of last day of the last test. Ignoring that mistake (right?), Ten Cricket would snap the video RIGHT after the ball hit the bat. The bowler would be running in to bowl the next over by the time the clutches of the blood sucking advertisements would loosen. And only then we would figure out if there was a run, or a wicket or a dot, or a fist fight in the last ball of the previous over.

I was in office when this occurred, but I think it is not hard for me to imagine it, when someone tweeted – “The third umpire goes upstairs, and…. it’s an advertisement break!”

This Mr Ten Cricket can’t wait for a couple of minutes to watch the verdict from the third umpire. Mr Ten Cricket could’ve peed in his pants if he wanted to pee that much. If anyone gets injured, Mr Ten Cricket’s army of advertisements will appear as soon as the physio gets off his seat. You might wonder where the button is, on the physio’s chair? Drinks break would see the ads come before the umpire signals drinks. Mr Ten Cricket signals drinks.

If I see an ad break go for so long, I keep thinking that it is either drinks break or a fall of a wicket (depending on when I see that string of advertisements). And it’s become so frustrating that I can’t remember what advertisements came in. Ok, one I can remember – Irfan Khan in one Vodafone ad. Clearly feeding me more ads when I’m not hungry hasn’t worked in your favour, Mr Ten Cricket (cc: whoever sent him that fodder).

All this for what? Profit? If Ten Cricket’s coverage in the Middle East can save the nuisance, why not in India? How do other channels manage to make enough money from neutral series and stay afloat, with quality? I didn’t find this during the Ashes on Espn-Star Network. A sports coverage which has no time or money to cover the nuances of its art has no business continuing doing so. I will take any other feasible alternative to watch a cropped coverage of the game.

Quoting the basket legend Michael Jordan’s retort to his team owner, during from 1998-99 lock-out period, where the owners locked players out from playing games because they couldn’t make enough money from the NBA season-

“If you can’t make make profit, you should sell the team.”

TEN CRICKAD – The Ad comes in, before Cricket could end.

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A foolish cricket fan

Posted on 20 November 2011 | 3 Comments

Two test matches have been played in the India-West Indies series, and I’m yet to watch a single ball live. Last time they were in India, my dad was able to watch some days’ play live, the ones on weekend. I have myself to blame for missing day-1of first test, yes, but now, I have to pray for the Bombay game to reach day-5 to catch a glimpse of a game live.

How hard is it to organize a game that can ease into the weekends and then finish on a Monday or a Tuesday? BCCI go against the government’s Sports Bill, but the 9-to-5 schedule of test matches on weekdays makes it look like an Indian governmental functionary than many others actually do. Sarkari kaam…

I was atleast able to follow the game by some mean. People come to me a day or two after the test asking how much XYZ scored, or, how much lead India has over West Indies now.  Cricket is slowly slipping out of people’s mind. Such a scheduling is pushing us fans away from the game. In other words, it is not attracting us towards it.

Also found smaller turn outs in stadia during both the English ODI and the WI test series. Myriad explanations and justifications came up for that. Cricket burn out, no-match series, “boring” series (???), and one more that caught my eye – the game is driven more by the television audience. People want to stay home and watch the game rather than go to the stadium. Have heard “when I can watch it here, why would I want to go all the way there and watch it?” Here’s my retort to them – “Why go on a vacation to any tourist spot if you can watch videos and photos of the place sitting at home?”

It was a horrible spring/summer of 1999, after which my family moved to Chennai. I joined my new school 2 months after it had started. In my first month in the new city, I learnt that my school had thrown holidays when Pakistan played the test there. Only one test had uninterrupted play since that, and that game had more security personnel than spectators (vs England, 2008). Never heard any other place giving anything remotely close to a holiday for a game played in the city. I don’t expect them to. I might have ten years ago, not today. It’s how the game has gone. Value for the game has decreased from a festival it once was to an ignorable passing vehicle today.

Test cricket attendance was decreasing, slowly, but I think somewhere recently it fell like an avalanche. Earlier, test and one-dayers existed. It wasn’t tough for people to go for test matches. Today, in comparison to those times, the pay, transport, roads, connectivity, communication and access have improved, but it somehow got tougher for people to go for test matches. I may be a fool in understanding this, but I would like to remain so.

T20 came in. Supposedly the game has been blessed with new fans with the arrival of the T20s. I hope that is true, I’m not yet convinced about that myself. Last night, I was called “shameless” for watching test cricket (SAvAUS, 2nd test, day-2, Steyn and Tahir bowling). Not the first such remark I’ve faced. Rolling back a couple of years, when my college mates were about to turn into bed, my alarm woke me up. It was 3:15 am, and I was heading to the TV room to watch India’s first test match in NZ. I was laughed at. Earlier this year, I “troubled” the sleeping watchman (who had absolutely no business sleeping when he must be doing his job) to watch Pakistan’s tour of West Indies. The college then locked the room permanently which made me miss watching on TV most of India’s tour of West Indies and the English tour. Internet streaming is only a consolation.

“Shameless”? Really? When I quack about dislike of T20s and ‘IPL’ cricket, or bite those fans, I’m a fool, a stubborn narrow minded idiot, but these people who can call me such must be saints, I guess. I have trained myself to ignore “Abbey saale, test match kaun dekhta hai?” comments, 5 years after standing on a dais and begging my class of 73 to give a little bit more importance to test cricket in my first year of college. (That was before ICL or IPL hit any of us.) But of course, I was a fool…

Jumping back to the India-WI series, I caught up with highlights of all days’ play (except last day’s of both test match), and I fail to see what’s keeping the BCCI with the commentators that were on there. Is there no way we can give them a feedback about them? It was easier to watch highlights, since most of their comments would not register on my mind, or, Yadav’s  innocent celebration would divert my attention, or Darren Bravo would make me nostalgic. It all helped, yes. Having heard those muppets over the years, why hasn’t there been any change at all? It’s something I rant about a lot, because a commentator is one of the three things I want to become one day. Atleast, wanted to. I would prefer radio commentary over television commentary, though. No regrets, I became of the other two things I dreamt.

I love this game, but my love was never tried and tested so much. Never before have I felt so distant from the game in my life.

-Bagrat

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The Ten FASTments

Posted on 12 November 2011 | 1 Comment

The Ten FASTments

Harder they fall, stronger you become.

  1. Thou shalt fell the stumps, and anything before it.
  2. Thou shalt serve your duty in terrifying the cowards under the hoods of helmets and behind  guards and swords, with bare hands.
  3. Thou shalt run up as long as you wish, it is the prequel to awesomeness.
  4. Michael Holding is a God. Thou shalt worship anybody with brutal pace and lethality.
  5. Thou shalt vow to be merciless. Brian Close’s chest is the bull’s eye.
  6. Thou shalt remind the batsmen, they are over-rated. Bowlers swing better than batsmen.
  7. Thou shalt feel sorry for batsmen, but only after thou becometh the one they fear.
  8. Thou shalt employ verbal torture. Thou can’t talk for long after he is out.
  9. Thou shalt do away with fielders. Keeper and umpires suffice.
  10. Every wicket deserves a celebration, for, a soul leaving the holy land of the pitch deserves a send-off.

You are the master of your slave.

(photos credit : www.bbc.co.uk and www.crickipedia.com)

-Bagrat

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The Third Angle

Posted on 25 October 2011 | 6 Comments

I like chocolates. I love them. I’m a chocoholic. For more than a decade, the freezer in the refrigerator at home has been chocolates’ permanent address. Other stuffs share the space on temporary basis. But now, my mother complains that I’m not finishing them off at the same rate as I used to a few years ago. True. I’ve had them, over and over again. I’ve had nearly all of them, been fickle over naming a favourite one each year. I’m bored of eating chocolates. Yet, I love them. Will have one, now and then, but not as staple diet.

I wonder if the same has happened with the fans of the game, and the game of cricket itself. One Day International cricket, especially. (well, the fall isn’t that sudden/steep in tests, has been gradual).

There was the World Cup, which India won. Unlike the World Cup victory in 1983, which put India on the map of cricket, this world cup win didn’t glue the fans to the game for long. No, I’m not saying cricket lost its fans, I’m just saying fans are finding it too hard to follow the journey of the game.

There was IPL even before the World Cup victory’s champagne bottle was uncorked. As soon as the IPL ended, the fans were too exhausted from the euphoria of the very dazzling league, that the tour of WI, in all its played down humbleness, received near zero following. I would be conversing with one or two people on twitter, at max. That’s alright, maybe? WI are not the same, Indian team was half as strong as the WC team, et al. But, look at the global picture – few WI fans attended it. Zimbabwe’s remarkable come back to (test) cricket didn’t get big turn-outs, Pakistan’s outings at WI, Zimbabwe and UAE aren’t well attended. But for marque series, there is hardly any interest.

Ever been to office/college/school without eating your breakfast. How well did you enjoy your lunch? Did the hunger make it more enjoyable? Was there more satisfaction?

The is no such hunger left in cricket, with cricketers having jam-packed international tours round the year. Teams play each other over and over (INDvSL in the past, INDvENG now & in the near future), it is saddening to hear of repetitive fixtures.

ICC is changing the rules of the game time and again, making it more fancy, or trying to. People have polarized views on each of those rules. But, in spite of all that, ICC hasn’t done enough to buy the fans into the stadia. It’s like an ungrown Mario meeting the monster at level 8-4, can’t do any better no matter what one tried.

Is there a way out?

Possibly, Tri-Nation Tournaments.

Australia had ditched it (and now going back to it), India has ditched it, England isn’t hosting any of this, nor are WI or NZ or SA. SL are, so are Zimbabwe and Bangladesh..or, rather, they have been the ones to do it in the last 2 years.

Instead of a team playing 10 games against 2 other teams by means of two separate ODI series one after the other, a 10 game Tri-series (3 rounds of 3-game Round Robin, plus a final) would deliver more excitement than the two before mentioned series put-together.

For one, there would be some competition. Every team would want to reach the finals, and have a shot at glory. And, more than that, there would be more following of the game. More people will be watching it, out of concern, at least. Instead of “ah, we won another game” in an indifferent manner, there might be a “YES! we go to the top of the table now. If Ind beat Eng in the next game, we will be in the finals….” and so on.

Three teams. You don’t have to wait for your favourite player from a third team to arrive after a month to see him play. You will see him atleast every other match. All three teams are involved at the same time. The matches would be more crucial. The possibility of a “dead rubber” will reduce. Look at the ODI series that we have seen since the World Cup. But for ENGvSL and SLvAUS, all other series were decided at the half-way mark. Only ENGvSL went to the last game. In a tri-nation tournament, the winner can be decided only in the finals. There is excitement. There is a wait for that excitement.

And over 10 games, one team plays only 7 games, at max. That’s atleast 300% saved for any team involved. The finals will be more likely a close-contest, than the final dead rubber of a bilateral series. And this single tournament is enough for atleast 3-4 months of ODI needs, you will have tests etc before/after it.

Just fit a Tri-Nation tournament in-between two test series, and see how it goes. Or go a step further. A and B play a test series somewhere, C and D play a test series elsewhere. Make A, B, C and D meet at a common point for a quadrangular trophy. Sharjah? Canada? Singapore? Or in any of the 4 countries itself. Why not?

The Shrine of Tri-Nation Cricket

Bring back the glory days.

Atleast one weak team can benefit from this. Involve them more, don’t discard them. Kenya’s last Tri-nation tournament involving a test nation came in 2003 ( same year as the last time tri-nation tournament was hosted in India). They were World Cup semi-finalists that year. Haven’t played another ODI outside World Cups since. Out of the top of my head, I can remember good performances by Kenya in two different tri-nation ODI series involving India. One was in South Africa in 2001. The other, in India in 1998 (it was actually an IND-BANG-KEN Tri series). Kenya beat India once in either occasion. They were minnows then too, they’re disappearing into the oblivion now.

We haven’t shelved away many of those Sharjah Cup games from our memory. The Tri-Nation tournaments in Australia have always been fun. Natwest Tri-Series in England, how many sweet memories haven’t they produced?

Let us hope the CB Series 2012 revives the endangered tradition of Triangular Tournaments. I’m not businessman, I know no money talk. I know I love cricket, and would love to see many more love it.

-Bagrat

(photo credit : Wikipedia)

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Going Places. A book-review.

Posted on 16 October 2011 | 2 Comments

Going Places : India’s Small-Town Cricket Heroes, by K.R. Guruprasad.

From gully cricket to Team India

I was at Landmark, browsing books, hoping to buy some books that would help me spend some alone-time in this new place I’ve now moved into, far from home. Lying in a small heap in “Sports Section”, was this book, the photograph on its cover, gripping my attention. Set my hands on it, read the title, bought it.

We, in India, love to play cricket. Anywhere. I’ve played cricket inside my house, on the staircase of my apartment, in the garage, between cars, in my classroom, in school corridors, on the streets, in football grounds, basketball courts, ofcourse in cricket grounds, and have also approved of a couple of bathrooms being large enough to play the game; and also told my colleague in office that the aisle between our cubicles seem to beg us to play cricket. This book tells us how kids who once played like this in small towns, with tennis balls, made it big. It is a fairy tale story for some, bed of thorn for some others.

Author, K.R. Guruprasad, from Bellary, tells us how he enjoyed the game as a kid, when the local cricket club had the best ever players one can see, and how it seemed pointless at that point for anyone playing the game to represent the country, as there cannot be any more pride than playing for the local club you grew up watching. Things changed with television age. And the world cup victory. He tells us how people could’ve watched the ’83 WC if they went to big cities, like Madras. But the rest of India had to manage with radio, which would at that age allot a minimal time to cricket inbetween its regular programs.

How the author takes us from this introduction to setting before us eleven players from the rural pockets of India who have made a name for themselves at the international stage (or about to…) is magical. He travels from the urban metros to villages, from cricket academies in Bangalore, to sports hostels in Lucknow. He meets people who’ve helped cut to shape the diamonds we celebrate today as crowns of Indian cricket.

The XI listed in the book – Mahendra Singh Dhoni, Santhakumaran Sreesanth, Virender Sehwag, Ashok Dinda, Munaf Patel, Suresh Raina, R. Vinay Kumar, Iqbal Abdullah, Praveen Kumar, Ravindra Jadeja and Harbhajan Singh.

The books tells us all the hardship that cricket dreamers in the rural India have to face. The lack of facilities, lesser access to media to pronounce their performances to a larger audience, and lack of funds. What keeps them together, however, is their hard work. Sheer hard work. And some wonderful gem of people who actually took them to where they now are.

The books indirectly lists four factors have featured as major reasons to why we now see more cricketers from rural pockets play for Team India -

1. The New Ranji Trophy Format

Until the 2001/02 season, Ranji Trophy was zonal. But for the top bracket, rest of the teams would hardly get to play more than 3 or 4 games. It was harder to spot talent. Teams with better facilities would survive most rounds. Lesser teams would be eliminated without even facing big names, and hence always lying behind on quality. Delhi, Bengal, TN, Mumbai, Hyderabad, Karnataka would get to play more and perform more, as compared to Uttar Pradesh, Rajasthan, Saurashtra or Kerala. Selectors saw the same faces more regularly, and cricketers from select regions were more likely to make it to the Indian team.

From 2002/03 season on, zonal system was abolished and Elite + Plate league was announced. Every team would play a league, and play as many games as any other team in their league, and play the big names. Competitiveness improved. The author gives UP as an example. UP favoured from the format change, then had a Ranji victory, then had Kaif, and that was a spring board for many more to follow – Suresh Raina, Piyush Chawla, RP Singh, Praveen Kumar. Well, we’ve now even had a Plate League team win the Ranji Trophy.

2. The IPL

The IPL was an instant hunt for talent across all teams in the country, and some new names propped up on the screen, rubbing shoulders with big names. The new kids from the domestic circuits in the rural India now shared the glamour worn by international stars. They played with them, against them, and in the process learnt new art, made friends to fall back on for advice etc. What IPL gave them more than anything, was money, money to survive the toughness of rural reality. In the book, you will find examples to how the breakthrough of IPL has helped many families break even with the world and start living in peace.

3. Family, mentors and friends

Cricket was not a serious option in rural India, not sure if it is today either. Most families aren’t enthusiastic about investing money in their child’s cricket. But, there are some who can see that their kid has it in him to make it to the big level. If you read between the lines, you would actually realise that the “heroes” mentioned in the tagline for the title of this book is actually meant for the mentors. Amazing examples of mentors fill the pages of the book, who, through their whole hearted love for the game and the wards, has put new names on the Indian cricket team. Even today, amidst all the shine and gloss that pampers the cricketers, first thing they do once back home is visit their mentors, spend quality time with friends and enjoy the comfort of home. For the rural people, these kids have always been their heroes, since the day the kid broke their window pane 15 years ago. In urban, there are so many things on your mind, you never know if your neighbour is a hero until he makes an appearance on TV.

4. HARD WORK

The author says how the kids in rural region seemed to be extra hard-working. Yes, one has to work hard to survive in the game, but the ones from rural region have to put in extra effort to match players from urban India. The lack of state-of-art facilities, coaches and technology kept their progress rate slower than compatriots. But some broke through. Again, credits to mentors, first for spotting them, and then persisting with them alll through the good, bad and ugly stages of their life before the glory days started. Some coaches still offer tutorials free of cost, some recruit their wards from places 1000 miles away from home, and feed them in their home like their own sons. Such is the hard work and dedication from the mentors, you can only wonder how much they would extract off their wards.

The author tells us how these stars from rural regions have had to battle myriad difficulties in their life to reach the top. It was no rose bed. One was 45 days from leaving to Africa to earn a living and survive his family. One had given up on cricket and thought of becoming a truck driver in Canada. How right people find themselves in the right time in these people’s lives is explained beautifully. Giving up was something was an attitude that had to be removed from their minds, and was done well too.

Some anecdotes made me smile, some made me weep. If one has to learn something from this book, it is that nothing is reserved to the big cities. If you want something, your determination will take you to the top.

Excellent work by K.R. Guruprasad for having put together all this in one book, having traveled from hot and dry places to wet and sludgy streets, just to meet the people who would best paint the portrait of these cricketers we have now come to adore.

I recommend this book to anyone who loves Indian cricket.

“Going Places : India’s Small-Town Cricket Heroes”, by K.R. Guruprasad.
Penguin Books.
Rs. 199/-

(photo credit : Penguin Books)

- Bagrat

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